Exhibit 22.26

Literary Criticism Done as if I Were a Character’s Opinionated Friend and Could Give Them Advice Then Publish Said Advice in an Academic Journal and Become Bigger than Stanley Fish

Jane Eyre

Look, he isn’t going to leave her for you. You think he keeps her locked in the attic because he wants to break up with her? And that’s not the only thing he keeps locked up. Your dignity that’s what, Jiji. Yes, we’re all still upset about Helen but that doesn’t mean you need to go find yourself another Mr. Brocklehurst. What about that nice fellow, that Mr. Mason who is always creeping around? I bet his place doesn’t mysteriously start on fire. Or, yes, go to India. Even better. He doesn’t love you. What do you mean he made you prove it? He dressed up as what? O girl. O girl. O girl.

Comment / Posted in Classes, Criticism, Fiction

Exhibit 19.18

Be Prepared for Literally Anything

This course description comes courtesy of Z. who found it while looking for a Medieval Baskets class for under $10 and came away doubly disappointed.

Primitive Baskets
Have you ever found yourself in a primitive or survival situation, with nothing but your hands to carry all of the food and game that you were finding and capturing along the way? No? If you ever were, you might be interested to know that you actually could do something about it, if you only knew how to make a basket! In this class we will learn techniques for making several types of baskets using all natural, local supplies. And as a group, we will construct either a melon basket or a sapling basket (both, if the class is large enough) using the same primitive techniques used by the indigenous cultures for ages. Tuition: $12

Well, have you? Huh? Huh? No, I suppose not. If you had, you’d have starved to death basketless and alone in a state park somewhere instead of having accidentally found this blog while looking for stock photos of kittens.

If you’d like to look at any of SCC’s other fine summer classes, the catalog is right here. I’m already signed up for the one about doubling my mind power. So if you notice me blogging twice as hard come fall, you’ll know why.

God, there are going to be so many posts about kittens…

Comment / Posted in Classes, Lincoln, Primitive Baskets